For What It's Worth
by DJ2
Summary: Daria has something eating at her soul, and goes to talk with Jane about it. However, she gets advice from a surprising source...


For What It's Worth 

By DJ

Daria walked down the sidewalk, lost in thought. She was in something of a quandary about her relationship with Tom because of sex. Not because he wanted it - not at all, it seemed to be the reverse.

Daria was satisfied with their relationship because Tom liked her for herself and not because she was some bubble-headed sex kitten, but he seemed to be lacking any sexual interest in her. He hadn't once tried anything when they had been together. Well, once he had put his hand kind of high up on her thigh while they were kissing, and she had hurriedly told him she was not ready for anything that physical, but he hadn't been offended or angry about it. Since then though, there had been no indication from him that he was thinking about trying again at some point. On the surface, it should not have been problem, because she wasn't trying to actively elicit a response like Quinn would - but his seeming lack of interest sort of made her feel that she was somehow lacking.

It seems like I would at least catch him looking at my boobs, Daria mused. The only physical thing we do is kiss, hug, and hold hands, and I'm comfortable with that. It's not like I'm ever going to emulate Brittany and Kevin, but sometimes when we are kissing I feel, well… like he should be interested in going farther. Was she just not physically attractive enough to turn him on? While she was glad he wasn't the octopus type (like Upchuck, blech) it was just too hard to believe he was that good at hiding his desires, and her ego was taking a beating. Daria shook her head. She wasn't in any hurry to be sexually active, but this was really eating at her soul. "Dammit!" she said. "Why do I always feel like it's my fault?"

Daria turned the corner and headed up the street towards Jane's house. Maybe Jane would have some input on Tom's lack of interest, even though Daria didn't really want to ask her. Partly because she knew Jane would have a smartass comment like "Oh dear, our little girl is becoming a woman", but also because she was afraid she'd find out something she didn't really want to know about Jane's previous relationship with Tom. Unfortunately, she didn't have anyone else to ask.

Daria walked up to Jane's front door and rang the bell. She didn't knock because Jane and Trent rarely ever heard knocking. She allowed herself a small smile, thinking of Pavlov's conditioned response experiment. Ring the bell, answer the door - good doggie!

The door opened, and Trent looked out at Daria blearily. "Oh hey, Daria," Trent said, his voice rough from sleep. "Janey isn't home from her run yet, but you can come in and wait if you want."

Daria hesitated, then said, "I guess I can wait for a few." She entered the house and closed the door, then turned to look at Trent. "I'll just wait up in her room." She noticed Trent was barefoot and shirtless, which momentarily stirred remnants of the nervous-but-nice feelings she used to get whenever she got around him. "Um… Sorry I woke you up."

Trent yawned and stretched, then sleepily eyed her while scratching the sparse hair on his chest. "It's ok," he said. "I really needed to get up anyway, the band has a big gig tonight and I have some things to get ready - you know how important my music is to me. Tell you what, I need to make some coffee - how about I make enough for you, too, and you can keep me awake long enough to get a caffeine fix, ok?"

Daria hesitated again, thinking to herself, only if you put a shirt on that bod! But she nodded and said, "Okay, but I'll just have some water." Daria knew better than to drink Trent's coffee.

She followed Trent to the kitchen, watching the muscles play under the skin on his lean body. Daria realized in retrospect that her attraction to Trent had been purely physical, and he had held the power to make her babble like an idiot with just a smile and a look. She sighed, because it seemed like her ability to physically attract someone didn't exist. Well, barring attention from Upchuck and his cousins. Tom had liked Jane first based on physical attraction, then had gotten to know Daria and started to like her for her intelligence after the physical had turned to nothing between him and Jane. Tom had seemed contemptuous of the Fashion Club's ideas about beauty, so it followed he wasn't put off by her lack of makeup - was there something wrong with her?

Daria got a glass from the cabinet and filled it with water from the tap. She knew better than to look for ice cubes, there was never much in the freezer. She watched Trent putter around, getting out the instant coffee and putting the water on to boil. It's probably a good thing that things didn't work out, Daria thought. I could probably have turned into a Brittany and jumped his bones constantly.

She wondered why she couldn't shake these thoughts about sex. Was she her parent's daughter after all? Daria thought of all the times she had seen Helen and Jake get hot at the drop of a hat, all the times she had listened to the sound of her parents late at night. Daria had always felt rather smugly contemptuous about her parent's rabbit-like lust sessions. She was shaken that this bothered her so much, because it just wasn't like her to get all worked up about this kind of thing.

"Are you alright?"

Daria started. She glanced up at Trent and realized he had been talking to her, but she had been too lost in thought to hear. "Um, yeah, I'm fine, sorry I spaced on you like that," she replied. Wow, you're really losing it, Morgendorffer, she berated herself.

Trent sat down across from her and looked at her with mild concern. "Is it something you can talk to me about?" he said. "You're being quieter than usual, and that's saying a lot. (Laughs/coughs) Are you having problems with Tom or something?"

Daria mentally kicked herself - sometimes it was all too easy to forget Trent wasn't a dummy, and he really wasn't the person she wanted to talk to about this. "Not really a problem, Trent, I'm just thinking about some aspects of our relationship and I wanted to get Jane's view on it. I, uh, just don't want to mess up something I'm confused about."

Trent chuckled and said, "I know what you mean. I've been going out with Monique for a while now and I still don't know how to act half the time." He looked at her with a slight frown. "Don't take this wrong, but I'm not sure Jane will be much help. Heck, for that matter, anyone in this family. We Lanes have really weird relationships, with each other and with everyone else. Besides, everybody's different - so you probably know as much as anyone."

Daria grimaced, trying to find a way out of discussing her feelings about her relationship with someone she had once harbored feelings for. Hell, it was hard enough just to discuss her feelings with Jane. She muttered, "Well, until Tom, I had no experience at all. I just thought it might be good to get another opinion, that's all."

Trent nodded and said, "Good point - but just look around at our family. Jane's had a few boyfriends based on lust at first sight, I'm pretty sure Penny likes girls, I don't recall exactly how many wives Wind has had now, Summer had a crappy marriage and can't keep a boyfriend or a handle on her kids. Then there's Mom and Dad - I don't think they would be together if they weren't apart so much."

Daria was taken aback. She had never looked at the Lane family in quite that light before, and it was a surprise to hear it from Trent. He continued, "I think part of the problem is that we mistake lust for love - you know, the whole physical attraction thing? Then the physical thing becomes the major thing in the relationship and we mistake it for the most important thing." He stopped and said thoughtfully, "Hmm, there's a song there somewhere."

Trent shook his head and looked at Daria. "I think that's why so many people screw up their relationships, they don't take the time to balance all the parts like they should. Liking the same things and being able to talk about stuff is just as important. That's why I keep going back with Monique - we have some of the same interests, but we need to work on the talking thing. I keep thinking if I keep at it, we can work it out. We just keep getting hung up on, uh, you know… the other thing." He colored slightly at this admission. "Then there are the groupie types, and that isn't any kind of relationship."

He stopped speaking and Daria just looked at him for several minutes. "You've really thought about this, haven't you?" she finally said. "I hate to say it, but you've really surprised me."

Trent grinned at her and said, "I try not to do that kind of thing too often. Think of it this way - if I let people know my potential, they might expect me to live up to it, and you know I can't deal with that kind of pressure."

The phone rang suddenly, and Trent snagged the receiver. "What? Oh, hey. It's what time? Alright, I'll be there in a few." He hung up and said, "Sorry Daria, I kind of forgot we were going to have a band meeting before the gig. I hope you get things figured out." Trent turned towards the living room, then stopped, turning back to Daria. "For what it's worth - I think you're more than smart enough to figure out what you need in a relationship." He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "See ya." He left the kitchen.

It struck her suddenly that it shouldn't be so much of a surprise that Trent could have such deep thoughts. Daria recalled several conversations with Trent that had revealed a capacity for insight - their roadside chat, the conversation at the flea market, comments about her piercing closing up, his insight into what was going on between her and Tom, his reassurances about Jane's friendship and the mild rebuke about what caused her and Jane's estrangement, even that crazy Freakin' Friends song - no, Trent was a very complex person, and she found herself smiling because he was her friend.

Daria sat there for awhile, reflecting on what Trent had said, and she realized that what he said had a lot of merit - and maybe Tom knew it too, and that is why he didn't seem to be concerned about the sex issue. Maybe she needed to talk to Tom about it, or maybe it just didn't deserve that much thought right now. The facts were that any type of relationship was a lot of work, but when you had good friends like Jane, Tom and even Trent, it was worth it.

Finis

I started writing this before I knew there was going to be a "My Night at Daria's", but it has languished in obscurity since I wrote it. I am way more of a reader than a writer, and I'll also admit I was uneasy about exposing my hack efforts to criticism as well, but that which does not kill us only makes us stronger. In retrospect, this story probably fits best right before the events in "My Night at Daria's".

Daria and sex have been discussed many times, in fanfiction and on message boards. Trent and Daria never really had a formal relationship, so I would never have come up this story during that period in canonical Daria history. However, as soon as she and Tom hooked up, the thought occurred to me - after all, what are teenage boys but walking hormone factories? So it makes sense that Daria would think about sex at some point, and expect Tom to as well. On the other hand, Tom is portrayed as possessing more restraint than the average teenage boy. Could Tom's sensitivity to Daria's feelings be construed as something else? After being subjected to idiots and perverts like Beavis and Butthead, Kevin, and Upchuck, it's understandable to be a little paranoid.

Why have Daria talk to Trent about sex? Let's consider the options - Tom? No way, Daria can't even say the word "relationship" to his face. Quinn? On top of providing Quinn with possible blackmail material, why bother when the topic would just receive Quinn's patented "Eeeeeeeeeeeeew!" response? Helen - no explanation necessary, while Jake's head would just violently explode. Daria's Aunt Amy would be a good candidate, but only if Jane was completely unavailable. We know Daria's opinion of Lawndale High's faculty members, and most of her classmates are way too dense/juvenile. Jodie and Mack are intelligent enough, but I really couldn't see Daria discussing this with either of them. The other Mystik Spiral members? Not a chance, which leaves Jane and Trent. I explained in the story why I think Daria would be hesitant about talking to Jane, and I am positive Daria would have talked to her regardless - eventually. However, I have always thought Trent was fairly intelligent, he's just - well - differently motivated. Since Daria has had a couple of intelligent conversations with him in the past, I didn't think it would be too much of a stretch. After all, Daria never actually had to come right out and talk about what was bothering her.

Trent's observations on the state of the Lane family's relationships - I tried to base them on data from the show for the most part. I may have stretched things for Summer, Vince, and Amanda - but I tried to base it all in whatever facts were presented on the show and and in the official books. Penny's situation is the only one I had no information about, so I had Trent just hint at it - and who's to say whether it's true or not?

The title? Like I said before, Trent is fairly intelligent, and he does know what people think about him. He especially knows what Daria was thinking of him after the ill-fated musical score for the multi-media assignment, and realized the irony of him giving her any advice.

There you have it - my first "Daria" fanfic. Hope you enjoy it.

"Daria" and all related characters are trademarks of MTV Networks, a division of Viacom International Inc., and are used here without permission for the purpose of seriously non-profit fan fiction.


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